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Friday, February 10, 2012

My dreams! is it too much asking? ' a letter to Chennai Dost' by Siva

On 2/10/12, siva kumar wrote:

> Hi Vikki,

> This is my recent feeling on a news in the news paper. If it befits your standards I wish YOU to put it on the chennai dost.....


It was really sickening when I read recently in the news papers that a lecturer was murdered by a person known to him when the lecturer (under influence of liquor)compelled his friend to have gay sex with him. It is not that there are no such acts by a straight person on a lady. There are many such news day in and out. But then when the party affected is a gay then it is "taken for granted" that he deserved such "punishments" and the other party is looked upon as if he was justified in the act of such hideous crime.

Please do not mistake me. i am not for a moment saying that act of forcing sex is not a crime. But the point I am trying to make is that such acts are 'seen' as crime only if there is no indication of gay action. Papers , media are really biased and make it appear that any atrocity against gay people is fair enough. In fact the Indian Express was regularly alloting a page on week ends giving gay news. But I came to know that it was stopped due to some pressure.

I really long for reading good news about gays in newspapers. I long to read news like " Gay men achieve laurels in sports for India' 'Gay men top ranker in University" "Gay man rescues a child" Gay men do service to children/ down trodden"
I sincerely feel that such projections of gay men would give a better blending of gay with the society.The Indian society will begin to see the gays as human beings like them. Why should it always be only Gay parade or some sex issue? I think that nowadays there are lots of guys (gay) who have come out in open. Why not they try for such achievements?

I hope I am justified in my having such dreams? OR Am I asking for too much.?


Hi Siva

Nice to see your mail after awhile. I can understand your outburst and the anguish on the below issue.

But to my little understanding on the community and the society which it is connected to it, i have few things to say here...

Since Delhi highcourt repeal in section 377 in 2009, community and activists has been trying to sensitize the media on the gay issues and we have seen plenty of development in that regard. Except few regional language newspaper, we are widely seeing a support and neutral stand on gay issues by the Indian media in general.
But as we have understood media too is commercial and any kind of sensitive news is a news for we cannot avoid such news been published by the media. But media coverage on out and open gay men about their achievements and activities has been ongoing. And i have seen several media approaching Chennai Dost and many other groups for interviews which showcasing our community in good light. But we have to accept the fact that there are few out and open gay men who are willing to share their experience in newspaper about their success. This does not mean gay men have no success and achievements in their life. They just fear to come out in public, which is understandable in a conservative society.

Since from British rule, gay men has been portrayed as a child molestar, rapist and sex maniac infact they have created section 377 to project us in a bad light to the society. though since from independence we have seen only few cases been registered under this section.

Child abuse and Rape cases has been higher and increasing day-by-day among hetrosexuals in India. If there are any few incidents on sexual assualt by gay men which is due to suppressing their sexuality by our society.

Overall the society needed to change its outlook on gay men, if it is done most of the issues can be solved, but this cannot be done by reading lesser number of rape cases or sexual assaults by gay men in the media. This can be only achieved if the society provide a space to the gay men to live free, legalising homosexuality and consider their love as normal and natural. As we have been stressing the fact sexual identity, coming out and financial independence is very important for gay men to make these changes in the society. To make these changes and gay men to be out and proud, the society needed to provide them a free space and understanding. A space where they can live without fear and shame.

But to begin with we need a free world and legal rights to live...I hope your dreams will become true oneday…We hope for a change, hope for a better world to live…

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