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Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Frequently Asked Questions - FAQ Part-3

What is the meaning of Gay Pride?
Vikki: Well, when you walk along with your friends in the Pride and look at all those by passers looking at you as if you are some kind of joke and then you feel like stepped onto the Cow-shit and managing not to let others know about it. That kind of thing. But actually Gay Pride means gays walk with pride not ashamed of the label given by the so-called social norms and heterosexuals.

What is Monogamous relationship? Does it exist in Gay community?
Vikki: Where are you exactly from, Planet Pluto? After Shri Ramachandra in ancient century no biological man with a cock believed in monogamous relationship in the history of the world till now, not even his successor Lord Krishna. So get real. But of course Monogamous relationship is one beautiful terminology existed only by word, which means two people in a relationship without having sex or relationship with the third person. Beware your boyfriend might be sleeping with your best friend. Especially in our Chennai community it is a big joke, but there are few exceptions. Guys who are fed up of this web-relationship now decided to stay Mono (single) forever. So stay random.

What is the meaning of Threesome?
Vikki: Letting a guy watch while the other two better-looking guys having hot sex. Come on guys, you don’t need an Oxford dictionary for this, threesome means three guys doing something which cannot be typed from my keyboard. May be my keyboard likes Group sex. By the way, aren’t you the same guy who asked about Monogamous relationship? Thats so Gross man…

Is there any terminology called bi-curious?
Vikki: Yes there is, bi-curious means someone who wants to experiment or curious about the alternative sex. After the court ruling on 377 I heard 77% of Indian straight men have become bi-curious. They have become so curious these days they don’t even mind being a bottom. Do you know there is a terminology called Straight curious, it means someone who is actually Gay but wanted to be Straight, they are the remaining 23% anyways. That’s pretty damn straight, huh?

I never been to any Gay parties till now, I wanted to go for one, its my dream
Vikki: Trust me, it is not like you heard. So what exactly happening in gay parties these days, we hug each other and then we start gossiping about him, we drink too much finally we look for a place to puke, nobody stripteases here, there is no gay bars or pubs here, there are very few gays who can dance here and the DJ plays music which can even turn a brand Nelly bottom into straight. And then you have to leave the place exactly at 12. It is a normal party where you can find gays and don’t expect any hot dudes here; they are all so happy sleeping at home hugging their teddy bears, so stop dreaming.

How can i protect myself from Swine Flu?
Vikki: At last there are some advantage of being gay. Most of the gays are so clean freak, so the possibility of infected by H1N1 is less. If you have enough immunity stop worrying about Swine Flu, if you think you don’t have start working on to increase your immunity power. Feel good factor for all cross dressers, please don’t discard your old bra (or the one you have stolen from your sister), cut the 2 cups and use as Swine Flu masks.

Is it mandatory to use a condom for anal intercourses?
Vikki: No, not at all. There are several other methodologies invented by our back bench intellectuals. You can use plastic bags, ballons etc...but if its torn anywhere in between no sweats please. Come on Guys condom is the only way of doing things for anal intercourses. Never ever say no to it, its safe to keep atleast one rubber in your wallet all the time. If you would like to know more about AIDS awareness and safe sex please contact Sahothara or

send your queries to Vikki at it will be answered in the next FAQ section.

Note : FAQ Part- 1 at

1 comment:

  1. first of all. serious questions like these should not be handled with sarcasm! some of these pertain to health and safety and you are jovial enough to humor about it. Sick.