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Sunday, November 23, 2008

The Evolution and my decision

Well, i have been thinking about a lot lately about how my future would be, especially my personal life would be. and there is little i could decide or predict. If iam straight i dont have to worry about my personal life or future, which can be automatically taken care of, or my family would certainly take care of, i could easily find a girl, fall in love, get married and have kids etc. Well iam not a straight guy, iam GAY. And i cannot let someone take care of my future, especially not in choosing my life partner. Even if i present to the world as openly gay, i might still find lot of difficulties in living just like another straight guy.

Why on earth, iam born as a gay, is this some kind of punishment for what i have done in my previous birth or is this a test for my character and personality to lead my life into success and happiness. As we all aware of the societies irregular insight about gays and the rights that has been not shown to live like a normal gay who can find a guy, get married and have kids, just like those Israel guys who got the kids in India (i have recently read it in TOI, those two Israelis are really hot). Well, as usual i have no idea. Though we call that we are living in the world's largest democracy. But are we still have the freedom to do what we deserved or what we wanted. The answer is "No".

Most of us might think the same just like me, Are there any improvement in Gay rights in India. Will there be anything like USA's Proposition 14 will be announced in India. We must accept that we are not just living in a democratic country. We are also living in a country where there is fanatic religious followers can still influence the politics and constitution. To my knowledge Gays have still not got their independence (for people who are poor in history, India got its independence in 1947).

I believe this is what forcing so many Gays not to come out of their closet or live a normal life. Most of us trying to hide the truth, pretending like someone and acting all through our life (some of us are still cracking jokes about gays to our straight friends, i think that is the joke of their life). Are we going to stand unite and fight for Gay rights? Are we going to find that special man and get married to him? Do you think 377 will be removed from the Constitution law? The society will accept you as Gay as like any other guys? (you can bet my ass). It is never going to happen...
So what shall we do? Do we have to commit suicide ? become terrorists? Or openly tell our society that we are gay and just live normal? (Come on guys, it will never happen in india, not in our lifetime, probably your kids may have a chance). So we cannot do all these things, because we dont have that courage, Gays are scientifically soft hearted guys, who cannot even lift a knife...So what are we supposed to do?

Finally i got the answer for all my questions(as i always do). i will go to Canada, take my boyfriend, get married, adopt kids and live happily forever. Well i still love my nation, but iam not a patriot i cannot sarifice my life for my nation nor for my family nor for my friends, because i just have one life to live and i dont want to live without love of my life and pretend like someone. i know it is not an easy decision, it may not easy living life in Canada, but still i can live in a country which treats every human as equal and giving a chance to live their way, where there is recognition for gaysex, gay marriage, gay parents and above all a Gay citizen.

Some may call it selfish by giving up the love of my family, friends,relatives etc. if anyone ask such question, please ask them these questions "Can you live your whole life without love? Can you live your whole life hiding the truth to your beloved people? Can you just forget about sexual satisfaction and just have sex like a machine? Can you just lie to your kids , parents , close friends ,wife above who you really are?" . Well certainly i cant, because i just have one life to live,if i give up my love or my true identity and live like other straights then actually iam a failure, i have defeated myself , i have killed me.

One of the benefit of being Gay is that you will have the superpower or skills or talent or motivation to achieve in your professional career. So i started making my moves to reach my Dream country.

If your parents or friends or any other who truly loved you they will let you live the way you wanted no matter what, but they are all selfish just like you and they will force you to live the way they wanted, so guys wake up, you are not baby anymore. Your father walked away from your grandfather on many ways, now why dont you do the same?.Well the Good news is there are some more countries like Canada which treats gays as equal. So guys you can follow my idea.

Note: if someone still wanted to sacrifice his life for his family or any other, well you can very well join Army, that would be more appropriate sacrifice yourself for both your family and the society.

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